And you call yourself a man...

Attention men, stop being fucking whiny little pansy bitches.

OK, let me explain this a little.  The other day I was at a freshmarket in Ft. Myers at Bell Tower walking out to my car, eating a salmon wrap, and as I was getting in my car I saw a man.  He couldn't have been over 35 years of age, and he was having a girl who couldn't be over 19 bring his bags out to his car.  What a little bitch. After spotting him I immediately threw my foot into his face, then I preceded to bludgeon him with my ten pound penis, then I made love to the 19 year old girl, who had HUGE boobs.  OK, maybe I really didn't mushroom stamp that guy, but he is still a pussy.  Men, what the fuck are you doing, I NEVER have anyone carry shit for me, let alone a 19 year old girl.  I hate what we men are coming to lately.  Guys, I know you think girls want you to be sensitive and all, but don't be a god damn pussy.  If your a man and you have a diary, you are a pussy.  Don't write about your feelings, just bottle them up so you can release them in a fit of rage on some unsuspecting midget.  Now at my job I am starting to see women be more manly then the men.  Prime example, two nights ago a lady and her husband come in, shoe orders a Manhattan, a nice manly drink, and what does the man order?  A rita-tini.  This is basically the second most pansy drink you can order besides a cosmopolitan.  If you want to be a real man, order a whiskey on the rocks, or just a standard martini.  That's what James Bond does and he is a friggen bad ass. 

So, in summation, guys, stop being pussies and be men.

-DanK

Comments

[Brad]

WOOT

[gio]

FUCK HIM!

[brianna]

rita tina???

well most guys are gay and pussies
why dont guys be like "Ralph Dagza" a gentleman who always open the door for you and carry your groceries! :)

[dagza]

i am not a bagger!

[DanK]

Shut up you pathetic little bagger.